Life : Meaning Or Mere Existence ?

 Well, it certainly has been a long time since I sat down to type something up. And I do apologize for inactivity partly due to my laziness and partly because I didn't have anything worth writing about. But today as I sat down after lighting the lamp I did come across this string of though that led me to introspect perhaps one of the most pragmatic and melodramatic questions of human civilization - "Why do we exist ?". 

Of course, the answer is not simply - eat, sleep, work repeat. Definitely our life must have some greater meaning. Even if we are just amongst lakhs of other living life forms in this universe, we are 1 out of a billion if not more. In that sense, the very presence of our existence raises questions about our destiny. And as famous geometric fractals say ( if you don't know what fractals are, nevermind, its a terminology related to mathematics), the part makes the whole. In essence it means, this is not just a question of the entire civilization but as well as for our daily life. I mean I have on numerous instances just closed my eyes and wondered - what lies ahead, what should I do and more importantly for who and why ?

Shakespeare said - "It is not in the starts to hold our destiny but in ourselves" - I must say that is rather quite ambiguous. Think about it, what in myself ? The question merely tells me I am in command of my destiny but does not really tell me how ? One might say they live of themselves - and again it would be a terrible answer, because honestly none of us truly know ourselves, at least I am still pretty much in that grey area. A few academicians might add, to discover the secrets of the universe. With all due respect people, in no way is that task simple or short of an honor, but making a common man's destiny with such a task is not right. No no, at the same time I fail to accept that my destiny is to lead a simple live - study well, get into a good college, job and then the usual marriage and family life. I feel the deep desire for something different, and I am sure atleast a few of you must have felt so. 

And all this leads me to think, do we have any meaning at all ? My actions now, do they even affect others ? Or in one sense, what importance do I hold in my life ? Quite depressing , I know, and hence the long post. We have seen in films heros and heroines getting to know their entire lifes purpose by either - a) love at first sight or b) meeting a crazy evil person and fighting for justice. But both of them are yet to occur in my life, and thus I sat as if old aged with no work, no direction and no passion of sorts. 

I believe that it is this quest for destiny that leads to all actions. We do things so as to enable us to acquire a meaning in the long term. I talk to my friends, because it makes me happy, it makes me feel I am complete. I follow my hobby because it gives my the joy and defined me. I like this film or read this book because it gives clarity and shape to my thoughts and views. Even my writing this post, is an attempt to mark my existence, it is to tell the world - "hey, I exist". Now I never promised this post was an answer, it is not even a proper question. It is just a string of thoughts I had, which I thought were worthy typing up. 

So if anyone has a better answer to this question feel free to leave it here, and with that,

Adios~ 😁